“Rights are love expressed as justice” – a message from Commissioner Chris Quinn to parents

Following our recent ‘incorporation conversation’, hosted in partnership with Queen’s University Centre for Child Rights, I thought I would use my opening statement to form a blog.

I received positive feedback from my piece, and I thought to myself ‘what was it that was different from other speeches?’ I thought long and hard about this and, the simple truth is, I spoke from the heart. I remembered the stories, the heartache, the joy and the pain that parents across NI share with my team and I every day of the week.

I hope in some way this piece helps – helps to highlight that rights are nothing to be feared. For those who question why I continue to speak up and advocate for children’s rights, I hope this helps them understand that I’m not asking for anything untoward. Its all very simple, really. Rights are love expressed as justice…

Speech: Parents as Children’s Rights Defenders (delivered at Queen’s University Belfast, 25 February 2026)

“Thank you for being here. I want to begin by saying something very simple, but very important: Parents don’t come to events like this because it’s easy. They come because they care.

You are here because you love your children. Because you worry about them. Because you want them to be safe, healthy, listened to, and to have a future where they can flourish.

That is what children’s rights are about. And that is why parents matter so deeply in this conversation.

What I see as Children’s Commissioner

In my role as Children’s Commissioner, I meet thousands of children every year. I meet parents, carers, grandparents, foster carers, kinship carers – often people holding families together and sometimes under extraordinary pressure.

I sit in school halls and community centres. I visit youth centres, care settings, youth justice environments. I listen to children and young people who are articulate and confident – and to children who struggle to find the words at all.

And I want to be honest with you: Alongside the joy, resilience and love I see every day, I also see profound harm.

I see children whose rights have been quietly eroded – not because anyone set out to harm them, but because systems have failed them.

I see:

• children excluded from education without support;
• children waiting months, sometimes years, for mental health services;
• disabled children whose needs are treated as inconveniences;
• children living with poverty so deep it shapes every decision their family makes.

And I see the impact of this on parents.

Across Northern Ireland, some of the most powerful drivers of change are not found in offices or committee rooms, but around kitchen tables, in late‑night emails, and in the quiet determination of parents who simply refuse to give up on their children.

Parents who campaign for change often do so out of necessity, not choice. It can be exhausting. It can feel relentless. And it requires a level of resilience that many people never see and rarely appreciate. But these parents show up anyway – not for recognition, but for fairness.

People like Deirdre Shakespeare, who has carried her campaign forward for more than a decade, proving that sustained commitment can move systems that once seemed immovable. Or Alma White, whose dedication has helped shine a light on the challenges facing families every single day. Groups such as SEN Reform NI, the MAs Project, and Road Ahead have pushed conversations further, faster, and with an honesty and urgency that could not be ignored.

Their persistence, YOUR PERSISTENCE reminds us that change in children’s services does not happen overnight. It comes from voices that refuse to fade, from parents who channel their frustration into action, and from communities that stand together to demand better.

We owe a great deal to these families. They remind us why our work matters – and why we must match their resilience with our own determination to deliver the change they have been fighting for.

The hidden cost for families

Let me tell you something I see repeatedly. I meet mothers – and it is very often mothers – who have had to leave work because the system could not meet their child’s needs.

Not because they wanted to – but because appointments are during working hours. Because schools say ‘We can’t cope’, because services say ‘You’ll have to manage at home’.

I meet parents who are exhausted – not from parenting itself, but from the fighting. From writing letters, from making phone calls, from explaining their child over and over again to professionals who rotate in and out of posts.

One mother said to me: “I stopped being a mum and became a case manager” – that is not how it should be. Children’s rights exist precisely to stop families having to fight alone.

Children’s rights are not abstract

Sometimes people hear ‘the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child’ – the UNCRC – and it can sound distant, legal, abstract. But the UNCRC is about very ordinary things. It’s about:

• a child being safe;
• a child being listened to;
• a child getting the help they need, when they need it;
• a child being treated with dignity.

And here’s something we don’t say often enough: Parents already live these rights every day.

When you advocate for your child at school, you are defending their right to education. When you push for healthcare, you are defending their right to health. When you listen to your child’s worries, you are upholding their right to be heard. When you protect them from harm, you are defending their right to safety.

You are not separate from children’s rights. You are children’s rights defenders.

The work of my office

My office exists to stand alongside children – and alongside families. Our casework has grown significantly, not just in numbers, but in complexity. We are seeing:

• more cases involving multiple agencies;
• more families at breaking point;
• more children whose needs fall between services.

What worries me most is not that families are asking for too much. It’s that they are asking for the basics – and not getting them. And when systems fail, parents are left holding the consequences.

The uncomfortable truth

Now I want to address something difficult – but necessary. There is a growing narrative, here and across Europe, that children’s rights somehow undermine parental rights. That listening to children weakens authority, that rights create conflict in families, that the UNCRC tells parents how to parent. This is simply not true… but it is powerful – and it is spreading.

Across Europe, organisations like Eurochild have highlighted a rise in anti‑rights movements – movements that frame children’s rights as a threat rather than a protection.

Let me be clear: Children’s rights do not replace parents – they rely on parents.

The UNCRC recognises parents as essential. It speaks about guidance, care, responsibility, and evolving capacity – not control from a distance. Children’s rights do not say parents matter less. They say children matter too… and those two things can – and must – exist together.

(But I want to hear your views! If you disagree, let me know – this is super important to me…)

What incorporation really means

When we talk about incorporating the UNCRC into law, we are not talking about abstract legal theory. We are talking about accountability. We are talking about:

• decision‑makers having to ask: “What does this mean for children?”;
• policies being tested against real lives;
• families having a clearer framework to challenge poor decisions;
• every penny of government money spent, assessed against the rights and best interests of children and young people.

Incorporation gives parents something powerful: a shared language. It means when something goes wrong, you are not just saying ‘this feels unfair’. You are saying: ‘This is not acceptable – and here’s why… ’

Why parents matter more than ever

Parents are sometimes told they should be neutral observers in debates about rights. I don’t believe that. I believe parents are uniquely placed to see where rights fail in practice. You see it when:

• your child is anxious and unheard;
• your child is excluded instead of supported;
• your child’s identity or disability becomes a barrier rather than something embraced.

You see the gap between policy and reality. And when parents speak from that place – with honesty, care and courage – systems listen.

A closing reflection

I want to finish with this. Almost every major advance in children’s rights has happened because adults chose to stand with children, not above them. And, often, those adults were parents.

Parents who said: ‘this isn’t good enough’, ‘this can be better’, ‘my child deserves more’. That is not radical – that is love expressed as justice.

So, when you hear talk of children’s rights as a threat, remember this: Children’s rights do not weaken families. They strengthen them. They give children a voice – and parents a framework. They offer protection – not interference. They recognise that raising children is not something parents should have to do alone.

Thank you for being here. Thank you for the work you do every day – seen and unseen. And thank you for standing, unapologetically, as children’s rights defenders.”